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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

This is the (only) 2nd time that I see something about it.
1st one was in an English course book (Matura Repetytorium), and 2nd one here in GL. Somebody is organizing an warsztat on assertiveness.

F**k me, what the hell is that about?

Do they teach how to be assertive?
hehe. It sounds funny, but I will seriously laugh if my funky guess was right.
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Keith Byrne

Keith Byrne Director, Select
Training Solutions

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

I organised an assertiveness course once. It was so successful, the participants demanded their money back at the end!
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Keiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiith!
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Keith Byrne:



Obrazek
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Andrzej S.

Andrzej S. Krok za krokiem, do
przodu.

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

ilter K.:
This is the (only) 2nd time that I see something about it.
1st one was in an English course book (Matura Repetytorium), and 2nd one here in GL. Somebody is organizing an warsztat on assertiveness.

F**k me, what the hell is that about?

Do they teach how to be assertive?
hehe. It sounds funny, but I will seriously laugh if my funky guess was right.


It's not they teach You how to actually be assertive, but guide You how to form your denials/requests whatever else to come in mind so they aren't mistaken for aggression etc. It's pretty tricky thing. But it is obvious that some people who are not assertive at all won't benefit much on such courses. Well it actually might depend on who delivers the course/training as well.
But such trainings are quite useful for some. :)
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Andrzej S.:

It's not they teach You how to actually be assertive, but guide You how to form your denials/requests whatever else to come in mind so they aren't mistaken for aggression etc. It's pretty tricky thing.
valuable skill. :)

EDIT P.S. For example, today I was asked to lend influence in a person's reimbursement from an insurance company concerning a treatment plan...and I hate ins. co.s, in general. I wanted to finish with :((( or grrrr

heheJoj Y. edytował(a) ten post dnia 14.01.09 o godzinie 21:05
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Anetta M.

Anetta M. AKME-Alfa Sp. z
o.o./AKME-Beta Sp. z
o.o./AKME-Gamma Sp.
...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Keith Byrne:
I organised an assertiveness course once. It was so successful, the participants demanded their money back at the end!

I never was THAT successful :(( but I also implemented some techniques from assertiveness courses in the management trainings I used to provide. Pretty useful in many areas.
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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Thank you for the information.

But I was expecting some serious background from experts.
hehe. I've had that Jerkiness Training.

You know, the term "assertiveness" doesn't really sound too good to me. Especially in professional environments, I thought, remaining silent and listening carefully, and being easy-going team mate is more welcome than having sharp eyebrows.
Assertive people, I consider, are usually d**kheads with no real knowledge. They are kids who deserve the hard lesson. They need to be slapped in the a** and taught how to be a mature person. Crash Course would be the nicest antidote for this sickness.

See what I mean?
You don't get the training to be assertive, YOU BORN AS ASSERTIVE, baby.

Some kidding included.

I seriously think the term "assertive" is wrong.
"Self confidence" could be better, but then there could be a risk... every trainee would feel like they are bunch of slimes, easy to be manipulated.

Oh well, I'm just a musician. hehe.ilter K. edytował(a) ten post dnia 15.01.09 o godzinie 08:46
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Self confident, assertive, speaking own mind... they're all just terms.

In my book "assertive" doesn't mean being rude or aggressive. I don't agree that assertive people speak their minds without listening to what everybody else says and that they draw infinite joy and pleasure from belittling others (being a dickhead and being assertive are two different things).

To me "assertive" is something else. It's being able to clearly express own opinions sometime even at the cost of hurting someone's feelings and regardless of "what will everybody else think of me?".

I'm not saying I am 100% assertive or am a fan of assertiveness, but I do admit it may come handy in various ocassions.

If assertiveness is combined with temper... Houston we have a problem!

PS: You're not born assertive.Jarek A. edytował(a) ten post dnia 15.01.09 o godzinie 23:29
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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Well, Jarek, the definition I get from Merriam-Webster web site is leading to

asserting
1: to state or declare positively and often forcefully or aggressively
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

right, that's why I said that assertive in MY book does not = aggressive

edit: and the difinition I get from wiki states

An assertive style of behavior is to interact with people while standing up for your rights. Being assertive is to one's benefit most of the time but it does not mean that one always gets what he/she wants. The result of being assertive is that

-you feel good about yourself
-other people know how to deal with you and there is nothing vague about dealing with you. Jarek A. edytował(a) ten post dnia 15.01.09 o godzinie 09:05
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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Okie dokie.
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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definition/a...

Assertiveness
Noun
1. Aggressive self-assurance; given to making bold assertions
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Mirka Jot

Mirka Jot HR Manager STRABAG
Sp. z.o.o.

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Oh Ilter...
You don't born assertive - it's skill which You must develop in Yourself in your childhood, and it depends from influence of Your parnts, your collegues etc..

that's the reason why people participate in such a courses - they need to be MORE assertive, or they need to know how to find out what do they need what do they want and how to express their needs in the best way - not hurting anyone(agressive) or not to submit.
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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Oh, ok, I found some more definitions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Commercial Usage: Assertiveness

Books Assertiveness for Career and Personal Success/Audio Cassettes(includes 4 audio cassettes, 1 workbook,2 multiple choice tests) (reference)

The Assertiveness Workbook: How to Express Your Ideas and Stand Up for Yourself at Work and in Relationships (reference)

Assertiveness at Work: A Practical Guide to Handling Awkward Situations (reference)

Your Perfect Right: Assertiveness and Equality in Your Life and Relationships (Eighth Edition) (reference)

Germany's New Assertiveness in International Relations: Between Reality and Misperception (Essays in Public Policy, No 37)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Apparently, it is a business. Probably like NLP.
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Anetta M.

Anetta M. AKME-Alfa Sp. z
o.o./AKME-Beta Sp. z
o.o./AKME-Gamma Sp.
...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Assertiveness does not equal arrogance. That's for sure. Being assertive doesn't mean being impolite or aggressive, cause you don't need to behave like that to express your firm opinions or demands. What's more, quite often arrogance covers character weaknesses and it's enough to be assertive in front of the arrogant to make him/her submissive.

As for self-confidence vs. assertiveness... well, to be honest I'm not sure myself what the proper differentiation is. I'll tell you how I perceive it. Self-confidence is a set of character features and the whole system of behaviours. Assertiveness is a part of it, cause it concerns mostly the way one expresses himself in front of others. Well, it may not be precise, but these are my definitions and I'm assertive enough to present them ;)
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

We can keep juggling defitions until the end of time and one day further, Ilter.
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Ilter K.

Ilter K. Business Developer,
Music Producer, AVID
Certified Instru...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Mirosława Jemioło:
Oh Ilter...
You don't born assertive - it's skill which You must develop in Yourself in your childhood, and it depends from influence of Your parnts, your collegues etc...
Ok, I need to clearly mention that I was kidding. So we could stop believing that I think assertiveness comes with the genes :)

Yes, probably it is something that "could be improved" or the advantage of being assertive in some situations "can be explained" to people.
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Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Anetta M.:
Self-confidence is a set of character features and the whole system of behaviours. Assertiveness is a part of it, cause it concerns mostly the way one expresses himself in front of others.
That's the message I was trying to get across and apparently failed miserably.
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Anetta M.

Anetta M. AKME-Alfa Sp. z
o.o./AKME-Beta Sp. z
o.o./AKME-Gamma Sp.
...

Temat: What is this assertiveness courses/workshops about?

Jarek A.:
An assertive style of behavior is to interact with people while standing up for your rights. Being assertive is to one's benefit most of the time but it does not mean that one always gets what he/she wants. The result of being assertive is that

-you feel good about yourself
-other people know how to deal with you and there is nothing vague about dealing with you. Jarek A. edytował(a) ten post dnia 15.01.09 o godzinie 09:05

Yes, that's how I perceive it as well.
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