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Lidia K. +
Temat: You might be Polish if...
This is a list of things that apparently make you Polish.Which ones apply to you?
Do you strongly disagree with any of them?
Would you add anything to the list?
Not having travelled much, I personally am very curious whether No. 16 is actually true...
1. You or someone in your family owns a Nissan Maxima with a PL sticker proudly displayed on the back windshield and/or a custom-made European license plate in the front (most likely with your name written on it)
2. You have relatives who aren't really your relatives
3. You sing the same song - “100 lat” - on every occasion (weddings, birthdays, baby showers)
4. You watch soccer
5. You know very well Pope John Paul II was Polish and his name was Karol, not Carol
6. You go to Midnight Mass every Christmas Eve and keep your Christmas tree up till February
7. You drink your wodka straight
8. You listen to techno
9. You don’t feel the need to add an "s" to "pierogi" because you know the word is already plural and it annoys you when others do. However, you still add "y" to already plural english words... "chipsy", "dzinsy"
10. You are convinced your pets only understand Polish
11. You are forced to listen to Disco Polo by your parents
12. You can spot Polish people like Asians can spot each other
13. When others find out you're Polish, they tell you about every Polish person they've ever known, which is most likely followed by them mispronouncing common phrases such as “czesc” or “dziekuje”
14. Your name always gets slaughtered on the first day of school
15. The thought of eating cow stomach (flaki) doesn’t gross you out
16. When you're at a stranger's house, you expect their trashcan to be under the sink
17. Every window in your house must have "firanki", even in the bathroom
18. Once in a while, you do a big "przemeblowanie" at home
19. You always take off your shoes as soon as you step into someone else's house (even if the owner of the house insists you don't have to)
20. You celebrate your birthday AND your nameday (imieniny)
21. You were extremely surprised to learn that American weddings last hours, not days
22. When you hurt yourself, you don't say "Ouch", you say, "Awwa"
23. you ever played "na trzepaku", "w gume", or "w Pomidor"
(source: Stolen from FB)
Courtesy of Natalia, the list is continued with some extra points
added by Anglospherians:
24. Find a chicken Korma unbearably spicy
25. You are jealous when Your neighbour or a friend has got sometging that You (for many reasons) can't have.
26. You capitalise 'you'.
27. Your car is older than 6 years and has had an accident.
28. When you're lazy and don't want to find a place to park, you stop anywhere and switch on your emergency lights.
29. You don't start driving when the yellow light comes on; instead, you wait for the driver in front of you to move forward.
30. Your vintage ride as an LPG tank in the boot.
31. about women in Poland: `Your dress is lovely!` -`Oh, it is old and it was even quite cheap.....(second hand btw)`
32. ...you refer to those who drive slower than you as morons and those who drive faster as idiots.
33. ...when you want to turn left and you get on the left hand lane 3 km before the turn.
34. ...when asked 'how are you?' you get moaning
35. ...when told 'you look great!' you say 'oh no, I look like shit, my hair is bad, I got a zit this morning, and my ass looks fat in this'
36. ...you wear sandals and socks with shorts
37. you always say that LIFE IS LIFE or THAT`S F...KING LIFE
38. You will never drink tap water, even when abroad:)
39. You are going to church every sunday with You family and the other 6 days You are with Your lover
40. ...when you're an expert in EVERYTHING
41. when you're driving and you start indicating at the moment you actually turn rather than a few seconds before
42. You're having a discussion and you suddenly become incapable of listening to what the other person has to say but instead raise your voice and start "proszę pana"ing
43. You're at the bread counter and are suddenly assailed with the urge to buy 10 small samples of various cakes, taking up at least 30 minutes
44. You're going abroad and you feel the uncontrolable desire to stuff jars of gherkins into your hand luggage
45. Whenever you meet a foreigner you treat him or her with unusual reverence. or totally ignore him out of fear.
46. You flash the lights at the car in front of you
47. When you meet an English-speaking person, you automatically assume you can communicate using your rudiments of German and raise your voice if they don't understand you:)
48. You eat a lot of medicaments and drink actimels etc....
49. when you're a girl and wear these long fake fingernails made of plastic with things attached to them
50. When you go to the GP and hear that it's nothing serious, you don't believe and go to the private Polish clinic, spend some Pounds on medicaments and feel happier!
51. ... you eat your spaghetti with spoon and fork
52. ... you have a bank loan in CHF.
53. You are giving almost 50% of Your income for public medical care etc. and You are going to a privat practices, cause You don't trust corrumped doctors
54. ...you leave your dog's evidence on the sidewalk
55. This is an easy one but quite typical: you might be Polish if you are very tan and know where all the 35 solar beds in your district are
56. ... your white socks are fairly noticeable coming out of your adidas shoes and a dark sweatsuit.
57. You might be Polish if your first association to '1410' is the bimber recipe.
58. .. you drink alot when you're happy, you drink even more when you're sad.
59. ...you don't shower in the morning because you took a bath in the evening
60. You don't think cheating at school is a crime.
61. you don't see anything wrong in buying yourself any driving license and have no problem with boasting about it
62. .. if your team has lost - it's referee's fault.
63. .. You are martyr of the nations
64. ...You deserve to be given things rather than earn them because Walesa jumped over the fence
65. ..you have mustache.
66. .. you think you're above the law
67. ..You think that owning a satellite dish or cable TV means You don't have to pay the 'RTV abonament'
68. ... you think you're a messiah.
69. ... you're always right and everybody else is always wrong
70. ...for years you thought FIAT was a Polish car manufacturer
71. You smoke at a bus stop.
72. .. You know what 'zupki chinskie' are.
73. ..You can't laugh at yourself.
74. ... and can hold a grudge for years.
75. You don't like Germans. But admire their cars.
76. You don't greet your neighbours.
77. You think gays are pedophiles.
78. You think just because poeple were born on nowaday Polish territory they are Polish.
79. You tell a learned Catholic what to do and what not to in church, then advise them to buy a zodiac sign for a Christening gift.
80. You don't like Russians, Jews, Gypsies and Romanians.
81. ... You think Romanians = Gypsies.
82. You think beer is no alcohol and that's why it's okay to drink it and you get aggressive when a ticket controller wants to fine you 100Zl. for drinking in public.
83. You use unabsorbant thin paper as table napkins in restaurants.
84. ...you refuse to use a deodorant in the summer
85. 77. You stand in front of every door of every public transport when it opens to spill out commuters and act embarressed when somebody bumps into you.
86. You stand in the doorway of every public transport because you'll get off in two or three or so stops.
87. You curse at the driver of a bus or tram when you are too late at the bus stop because you know the "soab" left deliberately before you could enter.
88. You feel a document isn't worth anything until someone sticks three different "pieczątkas" on it ... plus attachments with 4 different revenue stamps ...
89. You lived in either the UK or Eire in the last 4 years
90. ..you buy more than you need, 'just in case'.
91. If your dealbreaker for someone's morality is whether that person smokes or drinks. Everything else is just fine.
92. ..you torment an individual with: 'you say you won't have a drink with ME?! COME ON! you HAVE TO!'
93. You are Europes nr.one adulterers.
94. You doubt any comment about your country uttered by a foreigner.
95. You might be Polish if you're in a group of 3 Polish people, and there are at least 4 different opinions being expressed on one subject.
96. You might be Polish if you like to argue for the sake of arguing.
97. You might be Polish if you don't let your guests leave until they've stuffed themselves silly.
98. You think "kurwa" is a punctuation markLidia K. edytował(a) ten post dnia 09.02.09 o godzinie 12:43
